Archive for August, 2010

When to pull out all the stops!

For those that are dating online, many people wonder when the right time is to let it all loose and just go head over heels for someone.  While there is a time to do this, there are a few factors that you should consider before just going hog wild on that special someone you have been dating.

The first thing to consider is that you need to make sure that person is as crazy about you as you are about them.  Going nuts for someone and letting it all loose can completely back fire if the person you are dating is not on the same page.  Make sure you are getting the same vibes and signals that you are giving off about making this relationship go to the next level.  Both of you should be completely crazy for each other and the way to know that this has happened is by communicating with your partner.

While communication is important, it is also important to understand the goals and aspirations of your partner.  Is your partner looking for something long term?  Are they just dating to date?  Knowing the answers to these questions can greatly reduce the chances of backfiring on you when you do decide to pull out all of the stops and go head over heels for your partner. Most people that have hit this stage are ready for marriage as they are willing to put their partner before themselves.  This act of love and mental state is what a person needs to cultivate a long and lasting relationship.

The biggest thing to remember is to know how your partner is feeling and if they are on the same page.  As long as they are on the same page, you really have nothing to worry about.  If they are not on the same page, you should be very careful about going full fledged on them as it could back fire and cause some very dire consequences with the person you have been dating steadily.

When to turn it down a notch

Dating is a fun thing that gets people totally enthralled in the act. In fact, so many people get caught up in dating that they crave dating more than they do an actual relationship.  While these instances are rare, they do happen.  So what are the warning signs that maybe you need to turn it down a notch when it comes to dating?

The first thing that should send up a red flag is the amount of dating you are doing.  Are you going on a different date with a different person every day?  Are you having more than one date a day?  If so, you probably need to turn it down a notch.  While dating is important, the addictiveness of it can keep you confused and make you unable to really commit to one person if that is your goal.  Some people love to just have fun and aren’t looking for a steady relationship.  For these people, this article does not apply.

Another way to know if you need to turn it down a bit is if your finances are struggling because of how much you are spending on dates and dating ideas.  While dating is important, it should be done in moderation and fit along with your budget constraints.  It makes no sense to go into date just to support a dating habit because no girl likes to date a guy that is in tons of debt.  It makes you look weak and un balanced.  Keeping a dating budget is a good idea to make sure that you are living within your means and accomplishing the goals that you want to when it comes to dating.

Another sign to turn down dating is if you are seeing so many people that you can’t remember who they are after the date is over.  This over exposure can make it hard for a person to like you and feel that you could committ to someone.  If you are looking for a steady relationship, turn it down!

How To Find That Spark

Dating is often times a game of cat and mouse for many people.  There is always the mouse that totally teases the cat, but doesn’t want to get caught without a fight.  Well while it may sound silly to describe it that way, it is very true and accurate as far as how people really act when they start dating.  The girl is usually the mouse in this analogy and the cat sometimes doesn’t know if there is that spark of interest in order to start the chase.  So how do you know if that spark is really there to start chasing after that girl or guy?

The first thing to understand is that there are two different kinds of sparks. The first spark in dating is that primal attractiveness spark.  Do you find the person attractive?  Do you find yourself drawn to them physically?  This spark must be there before the second type of spark can ignite.  The second spark is to be attracted to them mentally.  Do you always think about that person when you are not around them?  If all you can do is think about these people when you are away from them, you know that you have the second spark.  Now that we have gone over the two different types of attraction sparks, how do you know if they have the sparks too?

The easiest way is to let things happen naturally when it comes to the first spark.  Do they have physical contact with you and are they giving you signs such as holding your hand or kissing? Once these signs have naturally happened, one of the best ways to determine whether the second type of information has been put into place is by communicating.  Straight out ask them if they think about you or wonder how you are doing when you are away.  With understanding these types of attractions, you will be better prepared to find that special someone who can lighten your life and make your life whole!

Don’t Try To Be Too Funny

In the world of online dating, first impressions are everything.  Of course we aren’t talking about the inital meeting, but we are talking about that first electronic correspondence that you give to that other person on the personal dating site that you are using.  Too many people totally mess this part up when they are getting into online dating.  The fact of the matter is that this first communication is important, and too many people just try to be way to funny.

Yes we understand that you have some humor, and its ok to let that come out, but the problem is that too many people sit and spend an hour writing their very first communication to their online interest.  This usually ends up bombing because people use language they usually wouldn’t ever say and people just try way to hard to impress people with their words.  Just write what you would normally say and just write the response right off the cuff.  This will help you to be more like yourself and allow you to type the way that you actually talk and sound.  This will make it easier on the other person as they will recognize your talking tone through your electronic letters and be able to program your voice into their memory.    By doing this you will also come off as being genuine and it will be easier for the person to match your real voice to the electronic communication and give you a better impression with that person.

So the moral of the story is to not try to hard, and just be yourself.  Don’t be something that you are not as that will make your online dating efforts a waste when you actually meet up to meet the person of interest.  By being yourself and also being yourself when typing, you will see that you will get better points with the date that you end up going on.  This is a great tip to follow when using the online dating platforms out there.

Getting Over The Online Talking Tone

What in the world are we talking about when we say online talking tone?  What we mean by this is the way that you percieve someone sounds by reading their e-mails and electronic messages.  When you read an e-mail or a text message, your mind associates a voice and the way it sounds when you read it, as if the voice you make up is reading it to you.  This type of made up tone that your brain automatically makes up for you, can be totally off from what that person sounds like in real life.  Often times, when people meet in person or talk on the phone, there is an unusual lack of connection because both of you interpreted the e-mails as making you both sound different than how you really sound.  So what can you do to get over this?

The solution is simple, by simply talking to each other with your voices…. alot.  The more you talk to that person, the easier it is for your mind to replace the made up voice with their real voice when they start writing you  e-mails and as you continue to correspond via the internet.  This will make the transition from the made up voice to their real voice quick and easy.  If you cant talk to the person on a date or in person because of distance,  use the phone.  If the phone bills start adding up, start using a free voip service like Skype.  Heck, with Skype you can even look at their face while they are talking to you with a microphone and web cam all for free right in the comfort of your own home. 

No matter how you do it, the only way to get over this weird transition is by using your voice and talking to them.  This will make online dating much more enjoyable and allow you to get to know that person on a very different level than just being their electonic reader.  Start making a difference with your online communication by using your actual voice, trust us, it will work!

Fun Online Dating First Dates

Online dating is something that many people are doing these days.  Having the ability to be able to meet people  on line makes finding people much easier than it was in the past.  With all of the people on line, you are bound to find someone who is willing and wanting to go on a first date with you.  Many people who get this far, often wonder what type of activity or first date ideas are out there to help you connect with your date on a different level than just typing to each other on a keyboard.

The biggest thing to realize is that although you have been connecting and talking online, it is important to understand that the way you act and talk is going to be very different than how the person imagines the other person from their online converstaions.  Most people have a different typing tone than they do their actual talking tone, so this getting used to is always a weird obstacle on the first date when meeting an online dater for the first time. So when you meet that person for the first date, in your mind you need to make yourself think that you are meeting a brand new person as they will sound totally different from how they sound online.  Once you prepare yourself for this meeting, the next step is to actually do something fun with this person and call it a first date.

Some of the best first date ideas to follow when it comes to online dating is to pick an event to get yourselves talking.  This will help you get over that weird talking tone barrier and will cause you to forget how they even sound online.  Pick an activity like going to dinner or going to a place where you have to interact and play a game together.  Just going to a movie is never a good idea.  While the movie might be fun to see, you will never really get to talk to that person doing an activity like that, so it is a good idea to pick an activity where you can talk often.

How To Handle The Second Date

So you have made a good online dating profile, snatched a first date, and now its time for the second.  There are a lot of things that go into that second date that can make or break this newly started friendship.  The goal of the second date is to start moving from friendship to relationship status.  I’m not saying that you should be officially dating by the second date, but you definitely need to let each other know whether or not there is mutual interest and attraction.

Too often a second date is a pity date in which a person takes out another person just to be nice even though they aren’t interested.  That may have been the thing to do in the olden days, but if you aren’t interested in a person, don’t take them out again.  By taking them out again, you are just messing with their mind to make it harder for them to be able to just accept the fact that you aren’t into them. You can also give them the wrong impression that you are actually interested in them and it can lead to a bunch of drama and guilt.  The second date should be set up if you are genuinely interested in that person so that you can start getting to know them better.

Make sure you do something that was different from the first date when planning the second date.  Do a different activity that will cause your date to open up in other ways and show different skills or opinions.  This will help you to round them out and understand their personality better and with more understanding.  This type of understanding is a great tool when it comes to trying to figure out their personality and likes and dislikes.  Another thing to do on the second date is to pick activities that are fun and exciting.  Too often people plan a boring second date which totally kills the energy that the couple felt on the first date. This lack of feeling or excitement can kill the momentum that was going into the second date.  Don’t get caught up in this and just do the best job that you can when it comes to planning that second date.

Setting Up The First Date

Once you have finally found a person online who is interested in you, it is time to actually have that first date with that person.  This date is where you will make that first impression and be able to see if there is any chemistry between you and this person.  There are a few rules of dating that need to be followed when setting up this first date.  We will go over a few items that should be covered when you are thinking about going out on that first date.

The first thing is planning.  Give yourself and your date enough time to prepare for it. Nothing is more annoying that to hurry and call up your date and ask them if they want to go out in an hour.  This gives the other person no time to prepare and will usually have them on edge and nervous throughout the whole date.  A good rule of thumb is to give a person at least 3 days notice of the actual date.  This will give them time to prepare, get things in order, and have a little bit of time to let the nerves settle down.  This in turn will make the date more productive as the person will better be able to be themselves and be less nervous and jumpy.

The second thing is to inform your date of what is going to happen.  This means if you are going out to dinner, make sure you let them know where so they can dress appropriately. Nothing can embarrass a date more than to be overdressed or under dressed for a certain occasion on the first date.  Also if you are doing a special type of activity like rock climbing or swimming, make sure you let your date know so they can bring the necessary items and clothing to fit the specific event.  This type of information sharing is very responsible and will just make for a better date in the long run.  Don’t fall into the trap of not giving your date needed information as it will most always result in a bust.

By following these tips, you will be better prepared to set up that first date and ultimately make it a success for both of you!

Writing Your Online Description

When dating online, it can be a little nerve racking when you try to figure out how to write your profile page. What do you put on there? Will what you put on there scare away potential dates? All of these questions and more are probably running through your head and it is probably difficult to understand what you should do. The biggest thing to remember is that you will get through this, and you can write a good profile that will show who you are and not scare away other potential daters.

The first thing to do when writing your profile page is to keep it simple.  Don’t go into detail about what years you went to college or who your professor was, just say that you graduated college and name the degree.  People online are pressed for time and its rare to have someone sit there and read the novel that is your profile page.  The key thing to think about when writing your profile page is to think about what the top things are about you that make you unique and special compared to other people.  Do you play an instrument, do you have special training, have you gone somewhere exotic, do you like extreme sports?  All of these types of things would be eligible to put on your profile page to ensure that someone that checks it out will find interest in the content that is provided.

The second thing is to make sure that you re-read your profile page over and over checking for writing mistakes.  Nothing is a bigger turn off for a reader than to have a horrible grammatical sentence or horrible spelling errors.  These types of things just make you look dumb, and no one wants to go on a date with a dummy.  Do yourself a favor and write the piece for your profile in Microsoft Word or some other word processing software to ensure sentence structure and spelling are correct.  This simple action will help you and save you from looking dumb when other people start reading your profile page.

We hope that some of these tips will help you in your assignment of writing a profile page when doing online dating.  Having a good solid profile page is important as it is the gateway that people use to see you for who you are.  Take the time needed to make your profile page a success!

Senior Singles

Senior singles

The world of online dating is a vast world indeed. There are millions of people who are looking to meet that special someone and who are using online dating services to do it. While you might think that they are strictly the younger generation, you might be surprised to know that the number of senior singles who are searching online has been steadily growing these past few years.

With the computer becoming a staple item in many people’s homes it has become an invaluable resource. Seniors have also caught on to this modern convenience and are utilizing it just as much as anyone. As they are becoming more and more proficient on the computer they are also learning how to access all the beneficial services as well. There are many senior singles who have found dating services and who have had great success.

An online dating service is ideal for a senior single for many reasons. The first reason is because of its’ convenience. You can’t beat the convenience of sitting at home, creating an online profile and getting into the online world of dating. This solves many problems that senior singles may have. For many it is not practical to try to go out and meet people. Some are confined to their homes; others don’t know where to begin to look for other singles to meet. With the convenience of dating online they no longer have to worry about how to meet someone or where to meet them at. They are able to browse through other senior’s profiles and try to find those that are most similar to them and at the same time will be able to start a meaningful relationship with them.

Another reason why it is ideal is because of its’ broad range of clientele. With so many people with so many backgrounds seniors will be able to find those that best compliment themselves and will be able to begin to interact with them. This can be the beginning of a wonderful new relationship.

While some senior singles may think that it is impossible for them to meet anyone new, many have found the services online to be extremely helpful. With many different sites offering many different services it would be nearly impossible to not find one that will be able to help you meet your goals that you have for yourself. Online dating can be the answer to most any problem that one may have when it comes to dating. If you will put in the time and effort you will be able to succeed.